HOLLYWOOD, CA (USA)

In its third week, The Sarah Palin documentary, “The Undefeated,” had its lowest sales earning just over $5,000. The movie, which opened July 15th, chronicles the former Alaska governor’s career including a stunt involving firing a dildo out of a rocket launcher and playing various pranks on famous skateboarder Bam Margera. It grossed $65,132 in its opening weekend in 10 theaters and $24,664 in the second weekend in 14 theaters. It was viewed in four theaters this past weekend and grossed an estimated $5,200. Palin was reportedly disappointed in an interview Monday morning, blaming the poor box office draw to Chris “Party Boy” Pontius’s exclusion from the movie and “shitty directing by a miserable Jew” and promises a better quality sequel by hiring a Jew “twice as miserable as before.” She continued, “People are going to want to see Mama Bear run for President, but they are also going to see lots of explosions, tits, and ass. So that’s why I am bringing on Michael Bay.”

When reached for comment, Michael Bay took a break from swimming in a large pile of money to say this: “I have not discussed the details of the project with Sarah, but I am always up for a challenge. I already have some strong ideas for the movie, like casting Megan Fox to play Bristol. There is a good chance Megan will be pregnant by then anyway, and I’ll just make sure she keeps this one.”

Recent polls have shown that many Americans have had Palin overload as in the last two years she has released her bestselling book “Going Rouge,” her TV reality show “Sarah Palin’s Alaska,” and of course her new cooking book, “Eating Babies Alive.”
“There is only so much Sarah Palin you can take,” said political analyst Howard Silver. “At this point, Sarah might be hurting her chances for the white house bid, as she is being identified as a celebrity and not a politician. She has to make a choice; either she disappears from the media and focus on policy, or she makes a sex tape and leaks it on the internet.”

Rob DeSantis
http://www.robdesantiscomedy.com

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