With the upcoming 2012 Presidential Election, the G.O.P. has powered up their propaganda machine and is ready to pour on the fear mongering that won them the 2004 election. However in a surprise move, the G.O.P. has decided to take their fear mongering retro, and instead of focusing on extremist Muslims as they have over the last 10 years, has turned their attention to a fear mongering trend popular in 50’s, chasing Communists and black-listing popular actors. “It could be a brilliant move,” said senior political fashion analyst John Heinz, “and it’s a timely, because Labor Day is coming up, and we all know RED is the basis of every fall fashion.”

Bill O’Reilly, popular Fox News pundit and host of The O’Reilly Factor, discussed the G.O.P.’s new fear mongering direction. “I completely understand the need for us, as American’s to bring back the Red Scare. The problem with targeting Muslim Extremists is that no Hollywood Actors or Actresses, or even people in government, are being accused of being Extremist Sympathizers. And without the witch hunt…well I mean, what’s the fun in that!?!? Republicans are going retro! I just can’t wait to see Sarah Palin in a poodle skirt!” When asked which movie stars would potentially be targeted, O’Reilly replied “Oh definitely George Clooney, Matt Damon, and probably Matthew McConaughey (not because of his political beliefs, but because we need to make sure he never makes a movie ever again).

GOP presidential hopeful, Michele Bachmann said today that Americans “fear the rise of the Soviet Union,” kicking off what is sure to be a great season in Fear Mongering.

Rob DeSantis