The INS is under investigation after inadvertently selling almost 1500 people to human traffickers between 2008 and 2011. These transactions were what are called “short leash” stings, where federal agents sell people into slavery in order to gather evidence on the slavers. However, in what was dubbed “Operation Tokyo Drift”, something went wrong. “We’d have the people in a big shipping container, interns mostly, but also some petty criminals. We’d meet the traffickers out in the middle of the desert, and help them put the container on the their truck. They’d give us a big briefcase full of money, and we’d write down what they looked like. We we’re all pretty proud of how smoothly it went,” an anonymous source within INS told GNN. It wasn’t until 2011 when a Human Resources official noticed a decline in internship applications that the problems with Tokyo Drift came to light: “Apparently the last 2 pages of the mission brief, the parts where you arrest the traffickers and free the captives got jammed in the printer, and therefore never made it to the copy machine. I hope the intern responsible feels guilty for this, wherever she is.”

Matthew Burdick is writer for the web comic Planar Madness