NEW YORK, NY – The FDA is not just taking progressive steps to restrict smoking but also smoking like hand gestures. Following the boom in e-cigarettes, known to help ween smokers off of the more dangerous and chemical infused tobacco cigarettes, the FDA is looking to regulate anything that involves bringing your hand anywhere near your mouth. Below is a sample warning that will be required by all companies to be packaged along with sales of pacifiers to children aged 1 to 3.
They also note that children that use pacifiers disrupt the activities of those that don’t and therefor should be ostracized and stripped of any say in any matter ever. There has been some confusion among the public as to how raising your hand to your mouth can be deemed as dangerous or how it may even apply to the Food and Drug Agency. Representatives of the group promised to answer all questions after consulting with the public relations company responsible for handling the missing Malaysian Flight disaster.